What makes a family?

This was not a post I was quite ready to share, but recent events have left me feeling like I wasn’t being honest with myself, or with you.

I know a lot of blog lurkers readers take issue with the fact that some bloggers make things seem happy and cheery all the time, even though we know they aren’t. I think that some things are inherently private, like your relationship with your significant other, your job or your children. Some items are just meant to be talked about with just that person, and some things are just too difficult to put on paper the computer.

I am falling into the latter when it comes to the subject of my family.  Every time I meet a blend in real life they are usually shocked when they find out I have 3 sisters, not 1. My two oldest sisters are my half-sisters as we have different fathers, my dad adopted them before my biological sister and I were born.

A lot of my upbringing was tumultuous and I don’t usually like sharing, so I am not going to share much here. Just know that my relationship with my two eldest sisters, is strained, at best. Recent nasty text messages that I received regarding my parenting have really got me thinking. What is family?

Everyone just keeps asking that I continue to be the bigger person and let it go, but when you have kids that all goes out the window. My immediate family is the most important thing to me, and I will do anything to keep them safe, and keep them from knowing people like this.

To me family are those that support you and love you. They can give you criticism and you can give it to them. No one is keeping score, it is a relationship where no one minds who is giving or who is taking in that moment.

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These guys are my family.

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These are who I call my brothers and sisters

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One day, he will be a brother too :)

parents

These are my parents

baptism

This is a small sector of my wonderful friends

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I would be remiss to not include people I have met through social media & blogging. While I haven’t met you all in person, having your friendship and support is amazing.

Family to me is not blood. I think sometimes we let that cloud our happiness. If someone makes you unhappy, it shouldn’t matter that you were born into the same household. The only person you owe anything to is yourself.

Sorry for the heavy post today. Back to my antics tomorrow!

12 thoughts on “What makes a family?

    • Thank you Kate, I think I had heard inklings of it from Nick, but it is hard and I wish you the best of luck. Annd we should really get the kids together at some point!

  1. I think this is so true. And thank you for sharing, it can be tough sometimes to open up on these blogs of ours. We live on the opposite side of the country as our immediate family but we have many friends here who are just as much family as they are friends. Our children even have a third set of grandparents who live across the street from us :)

    • That’s awesome. Growing up my neighbors across the street were like my second parents, my sister and I spent almost all our time there. We all need that support system, and it’s okay that it isn’t (or can’t be) immediate family.

  2. Just want to leave you a hug! Also there’s no way anyone can talk about the way you parent unless it’s positive. You are such an awesome mom and B is smart, cuten and polite.

    • Thank you, Caitlin, you are such a good friend. I can’t wait to see you and the beautiful little girl of yours in a few weeks.

  3. Totally agree! I’m glad you’ve found loved ones you can call family. It’s so important for everyone to have, no matter the blood relation.

  4. oh lawdy i am sitting in my cubicle right now with tears in my eyes. you are such a sweet, wonderful person and do not deserve to go through the crappy emotions you have been working through with your family. i love you and am thankful to have been included in this post and can’t wait til our next date. i am so honored to be in your life and be considered part of your little family. and that photo of nick holding B as he smiles at you…warms my heart :) xoxo

    • Thank you Cait, and thank your being there for me when I needed to talk to someone. You really are part of the family and one of my dearest friends.

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